Will you have a Blue Christmas?
Photo of a hiker walking on a snowy path between mountains.
For some people, December is the ha-happiest time of the year. For others, it’s the pits.
Here are five reasons why:
1. Tough Anniversaries
Whether or not we realize it, we carry around anniversaries of impactful events. These dates tint our present lives by biasing our subconscious or bringing up charged memories. If you’ve experienced loss, you may feel less grounded around its anniversary or re-experience the event on a smaller scale. I believe it is best to acknowledge and respect the anniversaries in our lives without letting them spiral us into a depression or ruin a good relationship (for example). By looking back at our mental-health histories and telling our stories, we can uncover the times that we need to give space to our emotions and keep our preventative mental-health plans functioning at their peak.
2. Our healthy lifestyles are thrown off
Whatever diet, sleep and exercise regime you have going will be tested in December. One benefit of Covid 19 restrictions is that we don’t have dozens of ugly sweater parties to get through. Even so, many of us are still stocking up on our favourite treats and falling off of our exercise regimes.
As much as I enjoy chocolate, cheese and wine, the lack of fiber, protein and slow-release carbohydrates takes its toll on every body system. Top that with a complicated relationship with “good” and “bad” foods and body-shame, and you have the perfect menu for increased stress and mental health exacerbations.
3. Family parties are trigger dynamite
It’s not just the gluten and dairy you have to look out for, it’s also your mom’s comments about how that sweater looks on you and your uncle’s take on the US election. Even the most zen self-realized adults can have a meltdown from a family function. In an ideal scenario I would like all of my patients to create holiday game-plans with their therapists for how to avoid the landmines, protect their peace and show up as the best person they can be.
4. Keeping up with the Hallmark-Christmas-Heros
GIF of people flirting from a Hallmark movie
Whether or not you celebrate Christmas and New Years, we are all bombarded with images and stories about what our lives should be like: perfect families, couples and homes are pictured everywhere. If you don’t have all of the above (like most of us tbh), you might feel especially alone at this time. And if you do have all of the above, you might still feel empty. It is the crappy shadow of “feel-good” holiday flicks.
I hope that my community is able to feel grateful for what they do have, let go of the flimsy Hallmark ideal and create their own sacred and weird celebrations.
5. Seasonal Affected Disorder (SAD) and Cyclical mood disorders
It’s possible that you have more than the “winter blues”. If your mood always dips in the winter or if you find yourself unable to engage in your regular activities, it’s time to talk to a health care professional. Contact me to chat or book directly through the site for a free 15 minute conversation on how we can help you sail through your winter blues and what a complete mental health care team looks like for you.
If you are thinking about hurting yourself or have hurt yourself in the past, it is important to make a plan with your mental-health and primary care provider. Safety-first is my motto. At the end of the page I’ve listed a few help-lines and chats. They are useful if your thoughts are becoming overwhelming, if you want to find out more about local mental health services, or your are concerned for your safety.
The holidays can be hard, but with the right support, preparation and insight you can make them a little better.
Wishing you all a peaceful holiday,
Joy Dertinger ND
Helplines 24/7:
The Canada Suicide Prevention Service: Call 1.833.456.4566 | Text 45645
Kids Help Phone: Call 1 800 668-6868; Languages: English and French
Toronto Distress Centres: Call 1-416 408-4357
Referral and information 24/7:
Call ConnexOntario if you are unsure where to go or who to call for mental health: Call1-866-531-2600 | Chat www.connexontario.ca
For Emergencies (including mental health emergencies) call 9-1-1
Disclaimer: This is not personal medical advice. Please read my full disclaimer here
